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icelandiclanguage:

umitk:

það besta sem hefur gerst.

"i know you were high at my mother in law´s wake"
"last week when you killed the dog"
"he sat on it while stoned"

If memory serves this happened when subtitles for The Sopranos were aired along with The Teletubbies, by mistake




smartereveryday:

sizvideos:

Video

Incredible imagery.  As a Dad, this is pretty awesome to think about.

imsoshive:

me: what’s for dinner?

her: *spreads her legs*

me: 

image

so, did you not cook or ….. cause popeyes closes at 10 and i need to leave now if i’m gon make it. 




amandaexmachina:

i-am-mishafuckingcollins:

milk-fro:

I needed to put this on my blog.

THIS IS LITERALLY MY FAVORITE ONE. I WAS IN THE CAR LISTENING TO IT AND I WAS LIKE ‘WHAT THE FUCKING HELL’ OUT LOUD AND MY SISTER AND MY MOM GOT REALLY MAD BECAUSE I WAS LAUGHING SO HARD

How many times did they need to record that before Cecil stopped laughing at it?

That’s the real question here.



thelostwhisperer:

thatcorbincrow:

ARE THESE SKELETONS HOMO GAYS???? I DO NOT SEE A BONE TITTY I AM UNCOMFOTRABLE

Well based on bones the one on the bottoms hips look pretty wide, and the forehead relatively small so it l would be a female skeleton.
The top one is harder to see from this angle, but the hips appear to be pushed out, so it is also a female.
They are lesbian skeletons.

willsicott:

tuxedoandex:

ugly:

What do you call the security guards outside Samsung shops?

what

Guardians of the Galaxy




ikimaru:

finished some more of those drawings from the other day :^)


agirlcalledfrost Asked:
OH OH OH PLEASE TELL US A BOARDING SCHOOL STORY PRETTY PLEASE

My answer:

talix18:

bapgeek2geekbap:

karenhealey:

bookdrunkinlove:

ofgeography:

so my school had this thing called “senior skip day,” except that senior skip day didn’t exist and every year the administration sent out emails in the spring that were like DON’T FUCKIN SKIP CLASS OR YOU WILL RECEIVE RESTRICTION (restriction was like, my boarding school’s equivalent of detention where instead of staying after school you had to go to bed early and help stuff envelopes advertising the summer program until your hands were BLOODIED AND CRIPPLED BY CARPAL TUNNEL) and every year the seniors were like YOLO THEY CAN’T PUNISH ALL OF US!!!!!

  • spoiler alert: yes they can? THEY ALWAYS CAN.
  • 200 years of american high school and teenagers still think that there is a cap limit on kids in detention and that you can leave after 15 minutes if the teacher doesn’t show up.

anyway, my senior year, we all got together and nattered at each other until some brave soldier (i feel like it was my friend paula but WHO KNOWS) was like “OK SENIOR SKIP DAY IS THIS THURSDAY!!!! NOBODY GO TO CLASS OR UR A SCAB.”

  • she didn’t say scab because she’s not from the 1920s and we aren’t newsies, though this story would be way more interesting if we were
  • what she said was “YOLO THEY CAN’T PUNISH ALL OF US!!!!!”
  • except not yolo because it was 2009 and drake hadn’t been invented yet except as a dear sweet boy in a wheelchair.

we also used this email system to communicate with one another that has very deeply informed the way i understand email and which probably makes it very frustrating to be my friend and receive emails that have subject lines like “URGENT” and then just 42 links to the same florida georgia line youtube video.

  • I’M NOT ASHAMED, but in that way where like i kind of AM ashamed so i’m really aggressively NOT ashamed? 

so the day of reckoning rolls around and my alarm goes off at 8 (class started at 8:05 but i liked to PLAY WITH FIRE when it came to being late; my mom actually asked the school to stop emailing her when i was a sophomore because i was late so often that their rote “Mrs. Ofgeography we are emailing you to say—” was CLOGGING UP HER INBOX and she was like “i GET IT MY CHILD IS THE MOST BORING MISCREANT OF ALL TIME.”) and i looked at my roommate elle and she looked at me and went, “you going?”

"hell no," i said. "YOLO. they can’t punish all of us."

elle, who was far prettier and far cooler than i was with the notable exception of her obsession with tswift’s “love story” and her tendency to look at the endangered species list and cry sometimes during study hall, quickly bizounced across the street to this shopping center thing where all the cool kids smoked in secret where huge trucks dropped off clothes for the Dress Barn. i think there were also tennis courts nearby. more importantly there was this chinese food delivery place and a lil restaurant that made HELLA BAGELS.

  • WHAT KIND OF BAGELS?
  • FUCKIN
  • HELLA.

off goes elle! meanwhile i’m like, “yessssss i’m gonna use senior skip day to watch 14 hours of tv shows and eat frozen peanut butter bars that i stole from the dining hall! I’M GONNA LIVE LIKE I’M 23 ALONE IN CHICAGO ON A WEEKEND WHEN MY ONLY PLAN IS TAKEOUT AND CUDDLING WITH THE FAUX-SNOW-LEOPARD BLANKET I WILL ONE DAY SURELY OWN.” 

of course, during this time the administration was continuing to send out emails that reminded us with increasing urgency that senior skip day was NOT A THING and that we were ALL GETTING RESTRICTION if we didn’t get our STUPID ASSES TO CLASS, GODDAMNIT, WE ARE NOT RUNNING A CIRCUS HERE. 

but i was like! yolo, motherfuckers!!! i already got into college, YOU CAN’T TOUCH ME.

at some point during the day elle and our friend ginna came back to the room with takeout from the chinese delivery place and we sat on our floor eating it and probably watching veronica mars or looking at the endangered species list and crying.

all of a sudden, elle said, “guys shut up, guys shut up, GUYS SHUT UP,” and ginna and i were like, “WHAT we have a LOT to SAY about FRIED FUCKING DUMPLINGS, ELLE," and elle said, "did you hear that?"

"hear what?"

that!”

'that' was the sound of one of our dorm moms, mrs. f, knocking on doors and saying things like, “IF YOU DON'T GET YOUR BUTTS TO CLASS IN 5 MINUTES YOU'RE ON CATEGORY 4 RESTRICTION FOREVER.” elle quickly scampered up our raised beds to hide in the corner, where a tiny human like elle could actually hide from view; i leapt immediately into what we called a closet but was basically a cubby with a flap that was DEFINITELY not meant for a 5'8” individual with knobby as hell knees.

our door, which was never locked because we both hated the effort of typing in the lock code, opened. mrs. f said, “mollyhall?”

i held my breath. 

  • i should add here that i seemed to be operating on like a scooby-doo level of logic where basically i thought that she was somehow NOT ALLOWED to investigate?
  • like, if she can’t see me, there is NO POSSIBLE WAY that she could prove i’m in here, right?
  • she’ll just poke her head in and be like oH GOSH NO KIDS HERE and leave!!

you can see the flaw in my logic.

mrs. f sighed. “mollyhall, i know you’re in here, i literally heard your voice ten seconds ago.”

  • there’s no WAY she guesses i’m in the closet!!!

"mollyhall, i know you’re in the closet."

  • NO YOU DON’T
  • I AM SCHRÖDINGER’S SENIOR

"mollyhall—"

there was a creak. mrs. f stopped. it wasn’t actually a “creak,” so much as this like, prolonged groan? like it’s the sound an elephant would make if it sat on a really large accordion.

i poked my head out of the closet. mrs. f looked at me. elle sat up.

i said, “where’s ginna?”

  • YOU KNOW WHERE GINNA WAS.

"um," said elle, "she’s in the—"

  • GINNA NO

ginna yes.

i really wish i could describe the sound the ceiling made when it collapsed. it sounded a lot like the way losing your breath feels. i sort of remember ginna falling in like, really slow motion, like i could see the expression on her face. i didn’t really think about how i would describe this in words. ginna’s face said:

  • oh no.
  • what have i done?
  • this was a mistake. 
  • i regret a series of decisions that i have made.
  • is there a way out of this?
  • are those oreos under mollyhall’s pillow?
  • why are there oreos under mollyhall’s pillow?
  • mollyhall, you HAVE a food cupboard, what good is a food cupboard if you don’t—
  • oh, crap.

she belly flopped onto the floor. i mean, the girl bounced. and then she just laid there. mrs. f looked at her. elle looked at her. i looked at her, still mostly in the closet. we were all going to get category 4 restriction forever.

ginna said, “hi, mrs. f. i feel like i should explain.”

THIS IS THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER READ.

No but really the level of my non breathing silent laugh sobs is pretty intense right now.

I have at least seven students who would totally do this in exactly this manner.

Epic! 

And now you know why I’m following OfGeography.



micdotcom:

The Miss Indian World pageant is the answer to Miss America we’ve been looking for

When Kira Kazantsev was crowned the new Miss America on Sunday night, a feeling of déjá vu set in.

Not only was she white — like all but nine of the 94 winners before her — she also fit snugly into a narrowly defined standard of Western female attractiveness: early 20s, long flowing hair and a thin, painstakingly tanned physique that would not seem out of place in a Victoria’s Secret catalog.

In many ways, the Miss Indian World pageant’s definition of what American beauty truly entails is the ideological antithesis to Miss America. Indeed, since 1984, this five-day competition based in Albuquerque, N.M., has honored Native American woman for their contributions to their communities, not their bikini bodies. The top award is given to the contestant who “best represents her culture,” according to Al Jazeera.

Why this pageant is world’s better 


noworld42mro:

emily-adomestic:

I made these to put up around my school for my school’s GSA. They are quotes from some little known bisexuals about their bisexuality.

Lets stop bisexual erasure and remember, bisexuality is real!

Bisexual erasure is a huge thing, even in the LG community. Let’s raise the awareness!


berrodtherapscallion:

me getting onto tumblr in the morning


why-wolf:

sexetc:

unimoosapus:

gayisthenewokay:

if i was bisexual i would use this line all the time

I am bisexual and I will, in fact, be using this in the future

Don’t forget Celebrate Bisexuality Day on September 23rd! Reblog if you support bisexual people!

oH MY GOD BI DAY IS ON MY BIRTHDAY THIS WAS MADE TO BE

presidentmikasa:

not being out as trans like

image





I am Chloe of Asgard and I am burdened with GLORIOUS purpose!

*~Chloe~Pansexual~*
Anime, Marvel, Cosplaying <3
RPing and Yaoi :o
Video Games and Drawing ^^
If butterflies and penguins had babies, they'd be flying penguin babies ;D





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